Switching 101

Switching 101

Switching, to put it simply, is someone who has traits, desires, and kinks that fall on both sides of the BDSM exchange of power. This poses a unique set of needs and considerations that goes much deeper than simply researching Dominance and submission as separate topics. It is the constant shift and balance that brings [...]

5 Ways for Submissives to Bring their Best to a Dynamic

5 Ways for Submissives to Bring their Best to a Dynamic

I distinctly remember typing "how to be a good submissive" into my google search bar and was frustrated at the vague or sexually based responses I kept stumbling upon. I felt like there was some elusive secret or checklist that if I kept reading I would eventually find and viewed submission as one size fits all. Ive known from the beginning I wanted to bring y'all real and tangible advice to help you feel like you are improving your submission, but without perpetuating the false beliefs I once held of one specific set of rules to be considered "good" within this lifestyle. Your submission is unique to you and that's what makes it such a beautiful and intimate gift to share with the right Dominant.

Safe Words

Safe Words

Whether you are familiar with BDSM or not, chances are you've heard of "safe words" in some sort of conversation, movie, blog, etc. And while this post's intention is to educate you on what a safe word is, most importantly I want to teach you when and how to use them the right way. Having a safe word is no better than having a car that doesn't start if you don't feel confident and comfortable using them when a situation or scene begins to shift to a place that makes you feel unsafe, begins to approach your hard limits or if you are just plain not into it anymore. And spoiler alert: Dominants, this blog is for you, too.

Sub drop

Sub drop

As much as I would love to write a post about how to avoid sub drop, in my personal opinion, that's an unrealistic goal for submissives and Dominants alike. With great highs come great lows and the goal of this blog is rather to explain what is is, why it happens and what we can do to work through it.

Interview With a Dom

Interview With a Dom

For a change of pace, I thought it would be fun to sit down with B to provide some insight to Dominance in a more raw and unfiltered format for you all. Keep in mind that B is my favorite Dominant on the planet, but if His answers differ from yours that's completely okay. Variety is the spice of life, y'all and Dominants and submissives alike come in all different shapes, sizes and kinks.

Dominance 101

Dominance 101

If I'm being honest, I spent an embarrassing amount of time choosing the featured image for this blog. I didn't know exactly what image I was searching for but I knew for damn sure I was not about to perpetuate the image of a Dominant being a well dressed man in a three piece suit. Dominants, possibly even more than submissives, have been forced into this one size fits all box and I am here to tell you that Dominants come in all shapes, genders, socioeconomic levels and kinks. In summary, much like beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Dominance is in the eye of the submissive. When you care for and guide your submissive, you are the perfect definition of a Dominant- even you don't own a suit.

Edge Play

Edge Play

Having briefly mentioned edge play in my primal post, I figured it deserved a blog of it's very own. Edge play is a term used to encompass a variety of kinks and actives within the BDSM community that lay at the edge of what can be considered safe, sane and consensual. In these situations, we need to switch into a mindset of risk aware consensual kink, or RACK for short. I warned y'all how much I love a good acronym.

Primal

Primal

Primal, in my opinion, is one of the more taboo and less talked about kinks within the BDSM community. I am not -by any stretch of the imagination-an expert in primal play but I am going to dive into what it is, how it is incorporated into the lifestyle and my personal experiences with a primal Dominant. This post may be a little long, so grab a cup of coffee (or tea if that's more your jam) and settle in.

The One’s I Call Mine

The One’s I Call Mine

I can't introduce y'all to my submissive journey without first introducing the one's who are sitting front seat with me. Enter, B & L. Yes. B and L. I am currently in a polyamorous closed triad with both a man and a woman. If you're not familiar with poly, skip to this post here and then come back so those terms don't sound quite as greek. In a nut shell, this means that the three of us have all chosen to be in a closed, non-monogamous relationship with each other. I am in a romantic and intimate relationship with them both, and they with each other and with me. Phew. Now that we got that out of the way....